Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
