I accidentally had phone sex last night
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
