you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
