I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize