Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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