I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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