I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
