So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I wish there were birth control emojis
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
