I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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