By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Randomize
