i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize