Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Randomize