it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
