I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
