you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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