I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
