you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
