Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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