Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
