woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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