I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
