You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
