Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
