So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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