this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
They have beer where we have blood.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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