Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
