Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
