If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
It all started with a game of naked twister.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
