Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
