Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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