you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Then you guys just all showered together...?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
