its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
