Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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