P.S. I can't hear my feet
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
