Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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