When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
