You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize