I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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