I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
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I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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