someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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