I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
