In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Randomize
