Pappa wants mamma naked
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
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I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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