apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
