Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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