i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
