Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

If I go to jail what happens to my debt?

(1-908): View more from New Jersey

You dont have to pay it.

(908): View more from New Jersey

I'm going to jail.

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(908): If I go to jail what happens to my debt? (1-908): You dont have to pay it. (908): I'm going to jail. http://tfl.nu/9by4

Replies (2) Good night (1447) Bad night (488)
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(323): View more from California

If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"

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(323): If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina" http://tfl.nu/xi2d

Replies (19) Good night (2753) Bad night (904)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!

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(612): I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER! http://tfl.nu/epkg

Replies (61) Good night (11349) Bad night (871)
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(210): View more from Texas

I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.

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(210): I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it. http://tfl.nu/c8qq

Replies (4) Good night (2274) Bad night (723)
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(507): View more from Minnesota

we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine

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(507): we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine http://tfl.nu/vvgu

Replies (7) Good night (2237) Bad night (573)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom

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(860): at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/ajul

Replies (3) Good night (1854) Bad night (523)
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(830): View more from Texas

Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.

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(830): Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point. http://tfl.nu/e159

Replies (13) Good night (545) Bad night (1246)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.

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(412): I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again. http://tfl.nu/ottt

Replies (5) Good night (366) Bad night (1001)
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(775): View more from Nevada

He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face

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(775): He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face http://tfl.nu/ksnb

Replies (5) Good night (784) Bad night (479)
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(647): View more from Ontario

So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.

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(647): So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers. http://tfl.nu/zbe6

Replies (2) Good night (894) Bad night (340)
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(214): View more from Texas

This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.

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(214): This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family. http://tfl.nu/r35r

Replies (4) Good night (290) Bad night (818)
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(703): View more from Virginia

HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.

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(703): HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER. http://tfl.nu/g3ji

Replies (1) Good night (1181) Bad night (285)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors

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(250): Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors http://tfl.nu/eym3

Replies (1) Good night (404) Bad night (230)
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(315): View more from New York

He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...

(1-315): View more from New York

Hahah. That's good.

(315): View more from New York

I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...

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(315): He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand... (1-315): Hahah. That's good. (315): I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out... http://tfl.nu/bifv

Replies (5) Good night (278) Bad night (447)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.

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(201): I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man. http://tfl.nu/58ag

Replies (7) Good night (232) Bad night (788)

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