apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
