I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
