in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
